I can’t believe someone invented the microscope. At some point in human history, some Dutch dude grafted a few lenses together and started looking at everything he could find. Could you imagine that reaction? You’re living your life, then suddenly discover that there are billions upon billions of microbes swimming around in your water? Talk about terrifying. And you don’t even know if the microbes are SMART or have FEELINGS and DREAMS. So every time you mop up a puddle you could be causing an adorable little genocide.

The best part is that the Dutch dude wasn’t even a biologist or scientist. He was a guy who made a microscope and went around blowing his own mind all day. Those really were the Wild West days of science. Sure, people were dying of simple infections, but you could be the first to discover things like gravity.