Dicks! Everyone’s got ’em! Hell, most of us got too many of them! If you’re looking for some Cool Uses for the extra dicks you may have lying around your house/apartment/storage unit, here are a few ideas:

• Lawn darts: Throw ’em in the air, watch them lodge themselves in the grass. Teabag your way to a good time!

• Drain Rooter: Tie a few of those suckers together, shove ’em down your clogged shower drain, give em a rub and blast pesky hair clots to kingdom come.

• Jump Rope: After you’re done with the shower, hand that flaccid dick rope to the kids and let them have some fun in the yard. “Cinderella, Dressed in Yella!” Always a classic!

• Ruler: Measure items four inches or under with an average sized dick! If you have an extra big object, measure it with an extra super big dick (~5 inches)

• Thermos: A hollowed out dick makes a great thermos.

• Throne: Turn that sad pile of dicks in the corner of your den into the centerpiece of your home! Grab some Krazy Glue and get creative!

• A Full Sized Sex Doll: Craft a mate out of several hundred dicks. Make a man or a woman, it’s up to you! So is whatever you choose to do with it 😉