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The Unfortunate Case of the Dickfish


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Today’s comic was unintentionally harrowing. Sure, we’ve done (multiple) comics where children encounter tentacled monsters and people battle bears with robot-parts, but that doesn’t come close to the horror that is the candiru. I’m trying to think of members species of the animal kingdom that are more terrifying, but nothing really is as … unsettling. I guess it could be worse. The fish could be programmed to explode when it finds itself trapped, but I haven’t read anything on that. Maybe you have. I defy you to browse Wikipedia and find another animal that elicits the same squirm as the dickfish.

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17 Responses to “The Unfortunate Case of the Dickfish”

  1. Wes says:

    Ok, so it turns out there is a healthy entry on wikipedia entitled “Exploding Animal.” Man, Earth is a scary place.

  2. Lenny says:

    I was in this back alley and was offered some yiffercat and after eating about half i woke up a week later bruised and naked in a taco bell bathroom with 3 cats that only responded to alligator. My girlfriend hasnt talked to me since. I wanna go home.

  3. abitdark says:

    Thats it, I’m moving to mars. Damn exploding and dick loving fish…..

  4. Tony says:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acoustic_Kitty

  5. Christian says:

    Thanks, I was looking for a new water phobia, since sharks have lost their mystique in my adulthood.

  6. crabGoblin says:

    They may not be blowfish, or explode, but they do have backwards-facing spines. Seriously. You can’t just pull ‘em out.

    Now, to find something completely different to think about…bleughuggayech!

  7. Chinny says:

    Quite frankly, guys, my life was plenty complicated before I learned there was a fish that could swim into my hoo-haa.

    Thanks a lot.

  8. BoscoFree says:

    That’s freaky as hell, but the botfly is almost as bad. Seriously, look it up. I know I shuddered.

  9. Wes says:

    Holy robot Jesus. I now hate botflies. They are like squatters that live in your skin without paying rent. Freeloaders.

  10. Alex says:

    Uueeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwww*yells and flails at fly flying towards me*
    Botflys, thats truly another example of why a good god does NOT exist.

  11. Jeremy says:

    Ever since learning about dickfish, I am incapable of enjoying scenic travel pics from anywhere near the Amazon. Especially if a man is in the pics. All I can think about is how many dickfish have invaded that man’s penis….

  12. Chase says:

    Yikes. I’d rather be lit on fire.

  13. Zorgulath says:

    Look up botflies and see if that doesn’t make you even more horrified. Follow the wikipedia links to the human variety and some of its effects.

    Be forewarned: You are not going to enjoy it.

  14. Ylatch says:

    Bullet Ant (Paraponera clavata)

    It’s an inch long, lives in trees and when you walk under it, it screams at you and falls on you (along with dozens of its friends) and get this… it’s called a “bullet” ant because it’s bite/sting is comparable with getting shot. It also screams at you before attacking. With friends. And it screams at you

    I’d also like to express botflies are the worst thing thing ever, especially because it’s larva can embed itself anywhere on your body. So let’s see: dickfish on the inside of my urethra, or a… botfly larva on the…. inside of my….

  15. dollar says:

    Ylatch, you’re gonna love this National Geographic clip. Wow.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGIZ-zUvotM&feature=related

  16. Wes says:

    Worst. Frat. Ever.

  17. Ylatch says:

    Dollar, I’ve seen that. I bet the next village over is saying “Damn man, can we please never go to war with them?”

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